Look for truth...

I’ve been thinking for the past week about this phrase from the Ash Wednesday liturgy from Book of Common Prayer:

“…Look for truth deep within me…”

On Ash Wednesday I wrote it on a mirror and placed the mirror in the middle of the kitchen table as a reminder that I wanted to join God in searching for truth deep within me. It has now been almost a week since Ash Wednesday and I have moved my focus for this next week of Lent from focusing on myself to focusing on my relationship with my husband (as you can see from the previous post). But, this idea of truth…truth deep within me… is still bouncing around in my head.

As I have shared before I want to focus on different aspects of brokenness in different areas of my life during Lent, starting with me and now moving to my relationship with my husband. Today I placed a chalice that we received as a gift and a print out of the blessing that my friend Tara and her husband, David, wrote for us when we got married on top of the mirror in the middle of our table. This was a symbol to me that I want to continue to search my own heart as I now enter this next week of Lent and focus on my marriage. This chalice and blessing will serve as a reminder to me of the vows I took, and the sacred relationship I am a part of, as well as a reminder to me of what marriage is and should be at its heart.

I have also shared that I want to focus on these different focuses through prayer… So, as I journey through Lent and find this idea of “truth deep within me” bouncing around in my head a prayer forms…

Lord, you search me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise. You perceive my thoughts from afar. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, oh Lord. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me... Lord, as I move from focusing on myself and my brokenness to focusing on my marriage and any brokenness there may I not stop focus on the search you want to do within me for truth, but may I simply add a new element to that search. Lord, continue to search for brokenness deep within me and by the power of your spirit begin a work to mend and restore and heal that which is broken in my heart and soul. Lord, search for truth deep within me. Search for the truth of who I am - through your gentle spirit reveal to me truth about who I am as a fallen sinful member of the human race, and truth about who I am as a redeemed, chosen, beautiful, unique women of God. Lord, continue to search me and unveil me. But, Lord, as I enter this new week of Lent I pray that you would also search my marriage, search my relationship with Bryan. Search for brokenness, for hurt, for sin, and bring to those places your healing, your redemption, your forgiveness, your love. Search for truth, Lord, reveal to us the truth not just of who we are but the truth of who the other is in you. Reveal to us the truth of who we are together as husband and wife and as “one flesh” in marriage. Lord, bring a new level of wholeness and completeness to my personal life and to my marriage. Lord, I pray that you would do all this for your glory and renown. In Jesus name. Amen.

Rejoicing in the journey - Beth Stedman