Lessons from being a caregiver: How to deal with resentment
If anybody asks
She took a deep breath, then spilled it out, “I’m so sorry. I know this isn’t what you expected, but we are going to need to admit you to the hospital.”
Bryan and I must have given her the same incredulous look because she shifted uncomfortable and started apologetically explaining in such a round about way that it was difficult to follow her. The gist of it was that Bryan’s liver counts were too high. Way too high.
Standing unconcernedly still
“But… do you still believe in the God of Abraham, Jacob, Isaac… all that?” He asked.
I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. “Well, yeah.” And then I stumbled through some sort of defense, an explanation. But what I largely felt was embarrassed and scared.
Know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em
“I feel like I’m shrinking…shriveling away…” I confessed and they held space for me.
I asked what I should do, how can I push back against this withdrawal in me?
Sometimes we have to walk down the wrong path in order to get to the right one.
I’ve been thinking about this thought a lot lately. Sometimes things come into our life for only a short time, in order to shape us into the people we need to be, introduce us to the people we need to know, or bring us to that right-place-at-the-right-time moment. It wasn’t a path we were suppose to walk down forever and always, it was just a stepping stone, the catalyst that gets us on the next right path.