Archive for the ‘Urban Ramblings’ Category

Nursing in Public: A Little Story

May 14th, 2010

It was November, just before Thanksgiving. As we walked down the aisle of the plane I felt nervous. This was my first time traveling with a baby. My 7 week old son, Thaddeus, was in my arms, content for the time being. About midway through the plane I saw an older women sitting by the window. The family in front of us took the aisle across from her. They looked nice. They had a baby girl who looked to be about 10 months old and a son who I guessed was 3 or 4. We had smiled at each other as we waited in line to board. I quickly decided that this would be a good place to nurse and we took the two empty seats next to the grandmother.

I was worried that my son’s ears would hurt and that he would end up being that baby on the plane that cries the whole time and bothers everyone. I had done my research before hand and talked to my mommy friends. Everyone said that as long as the baby sucked and nursed during takeoff and landing he would be fine. The plane started to taxi out of the gate and I started to nurse. Thaddeus was having some trouble latching on. He seemed tired and uncomfortable already. Maybe his tummy was hurting. I finally got him situated and a stewardess came by. She leaned in towards me:

“Do you have something you can use to cover up?” she asked.

I was startled and a little disappointed. I thought that I was being fairly discreet already. I hated covering up – it made it so much harder. He usually didn’t get as good of a latch when I covered up and then my nipples would be sore. I stammered out a “yes” and asked my husband to grab a blanket from the diaper bag. A stressful situation just got more stressful.

I struggled to cover myself. Thaddeus came off the breast and cried. He wiggled around. He was so strong. I wrestled with him a bit while trying to hold the blanket and also get him latched back on. It wasn’t working. My husband held the blanket up for me and together we got Thaddeus nursing again. Soon he was asleep and we were able to relax a little.

On landing, I didn’t really even try to nurse him. It was too much trouble. I glanced at the 10 month old sitting across from us enjoying a bottle on her mommy’s lap. For a second I wished that I had pumped a bottle, but the one time I tried pumping I was miserable and it wasn’t worth the effort. We had Thaddeus suck on my husband’s finger during the landing, since he refused a pacifier. He cried the whole way down.

Once we landed Thaddeus was hungry. We went to baggage claim and I found a relatively quiet place where I thought I could sit and nurse. My husband left our bags with me and went to get the car seat and stroller which we had to check. I struggled with my screaming son. With the memory of the flight attendant fresh in my mind I tried to cover up a little, but that just made Thaddeus more upset.

A woman with a badge came and sat down in a chair not too far from me. After a few moments she leaned towards me:

“There’s a family restroom where you can nurse by the escalators.” She said as she pointed in the direction I had just come from not long before.

I am sure that she meant well. I am sure that she saw me struggling and thought it might be easier and more comfortable for me to nurse in a quiet place – maybe she was right. But, at that moment I didn’t want to struggle with my baby and my bags and wrestle my way back down the hall alone so that I could sit on a toilet in a public restroom and nurse my son. I wanted to calm and sooth him right then and there. Really I just wanted to cry.

Instead I stuttered out “thank you.” Picked up my bags, held my screaming baby close to my chest, whipped away a tear, and walked away. I got half way down the hall when I realize I really didn’t want to go to a family bathroom and nurse, plus my husband would have no idea where I went. But, I didn’t want to go back and sit by that woman either. So, I went to the carousel where my husband was getting the bags. Thankfully there were a few seats right by the carousel and I sat down there and tried to nurse for a second while my husband got the last bag.

This story isn’t really that bad. I have since this time heard stories about nursing in public that are truly outrageous.  This little story is really nothing to tell. I mean no one asked me to stop nursing or told me I couldn’t nurse someplace. In fact no one in my story is really negative towards nursing at all, but I can’t really say that they are supportive.

Now I am more informed. Now I am more comfortable with my right to nurse anywhere. Now I am more experienced with breastfeeding. I can nurse truly discreetly without a cover and I can use a cover much more easily now if I want to. My son is older and more experienced as well now. He can latch on without my help. Now I could handle a situation like the one I just shared with much more ease and grace, but then I couldn’t and it ended up being a very stressful experience for me. Then I wasn’t experienced at being discreet. Then I needed to be uncovered and able to see and help my son in order to get a good latch. Then I didn’t know my rights when it came to nursing in public.

I need the me of now to defend the rights of the me of then. My story isn’t that bad, but there are others that are. And I can totally see how even little experiences like mine could really start to get under your skin and cause you to give up all together. Before I became a breastfeeding momma I wouldn’t have thought twice about a story like mine, I would have thought no one did anything wrong. And it’s true, there isn’t really anything wrong about the flight attendant asking me to cover up or about the woman directing me to the family bathroom to nurse, but it also is something wrong about it. Personally I think it does feel like there is something wrong in our society when a momma feels uncomfortable and ashamed for naturally, freely and openly feeding her baby. I can see how if you had enough experiences like my little story and you didn’t have support from family and friends around you it would be easy to choose not to breastfeed at all or to stop earlier then you had originally planned. I can understand why “according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, approximately 70 percent of mothers start breastfeeding immediately after birth, but less than 20 percent of those moms are breastfeeding exclusively six months later.”

The choice to nurse or not to nurse is each mother’s personal decision, but wouldn’t it be great if we lived in a society where women really could freely make that decision. Where if they wanted to nurse they wouldn’t be made to feel uncomfortable for openly feeding their baby whenever they needed to and where ever was most comfortable for them.

Here is a GREAT article with 50 Reasons for Breastfeeding Anytime, Anywhere.

What nursing stories do you have? What has been your experience with nursing in public? If you’re not a momma, or you didn’t choose to nurse your baby, how do you feel about nursing in public? What do you feel is appropriate and not appropriate?

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany Stedman

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Eating “Weeds”: My first Urban Foraging Experience

April 30th, 2010

IMG_4995Yesterday I had my first urban foraging experience. It wasn’t really intentional. I didn’t set off to pick food for myself from the wild. I simply went on a walk with a friend.

It was a beautiful, remarkably warm day, so Carrie and I took Thaddeus and the dog out for a walk. As we walked through the park I noticed there were beautiful fresh dandelions EVERYWHERE. And I was tempted.

Like most Americans I had always grown up thinking of dandelions as pesky weeds and would have never considered eating them. Then when I was pregnant last year I read about how nutritious dandelion greens are and how great they can be for pregnant women. So, I started eating them. But, I still never considered picking them – instead we bought them from Whole Foods regularly during the 5 months we were in the states. So, I had come around to the leaves, but was still clueless about using any of the rest of the plant and definitely didn’t consider anything but the store bought variety.

Recently, though, I read this blog talking about making dandelion fritters from the bright yellow flower and I was intrigued, but still ambivalent. But, then I saw all of the fresh dandelions in the park. They looked like the epitome of summer. They beckoned to me… calling out to me. “Eat me. Eat me.” So, I did.

I picked a few, came home, and made dandelion fritters.

It was really super easy and tasty. Here’s what you do.

  1. Pick some dandelions – just the heads of the flowers, no stems.
  2. Wash them well.
  3. Make the batter – Mix 1 cup flour (I used whole wheat flour), 1 egg, and 1 cup milk (I used organic sour milk because that was what I had on hand). Then you have a choice you can make them savory by adding salt and pepper or any other savory spice you desire, or you can make them sweet by adding a little maple syrup to the batter or, of course, you could just leave them as is. The choice is yours. I made mine with just a little unrefined sea salt and pepper.
  4. Heat some oil in a frying pan.
  5. Dip the flowers in the batter – just hold them by the base and swirl them around in the batter until they are well covered.
  6. Place the batter-covered-dandelions in the frying pan and cook until golden on one side then flip over and cook till golden on the other side.
  7. Eat and Enjoy!

The great thing about this herb is that not only are these little plants readily available everywhere, each part of the plant is eatable and packed with nutrients. You can make dandelion coffee from the roots, or put the roots in soup. You can make salads from the leaves, or juice them to add to a green smoothie. The flowers can be used for fritters, tea, dandelion wine, or you can just add them to a salad for a fun touch of color.

As I read more about this underappreciated herb I couldn’t help but think it sounded a little bit like a wonder drug with all of the health benefits it has traditionally been said to possess. When you look at all the nutrients packed in this little plant you can’t help but be amazed and wonder why we all aren’t eating these herbs far more often.

According to the USDA Bulletin #8, “Composition of Foods” (Haytowitz and Matthews 1984), dandelions rank in the top 4 green vegetables in overall nutritional value. Minnich, in “Gardening for Better Nutrition” ranks them, out of all vegetables, including grains, seeds and greens, as tied for 9th best. According to these data, dandelions are nature’s richest green vegetable source of beta-carotene, from which Vitamin A is created, and the third richest source of Vitamin A of all foods, after cod-liver oil and beef liver! They also are particularly rich in fiber, potassium, iron, calcium, magnesium, phosphorus and the B vitamins, thiamine and riboflavin, and are a good source of protein… Studies in Russia and Eastern Europe by Gerasimova, Racz, Vogel, and Marei (Hobbs 1985) indicate that dandelion is also rich in micronutrients such as copper, cobalt, zinc, boron, and molybdenum, as well as Vitamin D.

They can successfully be used to cleanse the blood and promote better circulation, cleanse and purify the liver, help balance blood sugar, treat anemia, and reduce serum cholesterol. They also are said to have diuretic properties and be useful for aiding in digestion. That’s just to name a few!

This is one little plant that I plan on taking advantage of more often – especially since it’s FREE!

Anybody else been foraging lately? What did you pick?

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany Stedman

foodrenegadefist_150This post has been entered in the Fight Back Fridays April 30th blog carnival at Food Renegade. Check out the link for other posts from fellow food renegades.

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Things Are Happening In Prague

April 10th, 2010

Today I went to Berlin without ever leaving Prague… Or at least it felt a little bit like that.

This morning my dear friend, Carrie, and I went to a FARMERS MARKET!! I wrote Farmers Market all in caps because that’s how excited I am about it – the words should be read with the excitement and surprise due to all capital letters. Hehe.

The experience was not at all disappointing. Ok, it’s no Berlin Farmers Market, but it was really great. There were lots of stands with a variety of goods. I bought fresh yogurt (and regretted the fact that I didn’t also buy the fresh whey they were also selling at the same stand). I bought some Czech made honey, and ostrich meat too. Yes, ostrich meat! Carrie and I shared an organic crepe made from buckwheat and drizzled with honey.

All the stands were clearly labeled with the location where the farm was located. The people were friendly and nice and there was a general feeling of excitement in the air all around. They had TONS of beautiful flowers, plenty of fresh bread from local bakeries, fresh dairy products, honey, dried fish, veggies, handmade baskets and some fruit. I’m hoping that as we move into warmer weather there will be even more variety at the fruit and vegetable stands.

The market was located near Devicka circle and from what I hear it will be happening every other week throughout the summer. Personally I think that they should make it an every week market since the place was PACKED! There were so many people there that you had to wait in line at every stand. From what I hear the first one they did (which happened just a few weeks ago) was so crowded that by late morning the stands were all picked over. Today Carrie and I got there at around 8:45 and stayed for about an hour. There was plenty of food and other goods and it seemed they were very prepared for the crowds.

Carrie filled me in a little bit on the history of Farmers Markets in Prague and I thought it was interesting. Basically, before communism there used to be farmers markets in Prague really regularly, but the communists were, of course, against capitalism and private enterprises so they stopped the farmers markets. As far as we know this is the first farmers market to be organized in Prague since the communists stopped them (although, I could definitely be wrong).

Anyway, it felt really great to be a part of this farmers market.

Latter in the day Mathias called and said that he had seen this flea market type event going on in a warehouse just down the street and that we should check it out so Carrie and Thad and I walked down to explore. It turns out it was a big fashion market with tons of designers and lots of trendy unique stuff. It’s called Code Mode and it was really cool and totally had a Berlin like feel to it.

It took place in this massive old unfinished warehouse. There were stands everywhere with cloths, jewelry, purses, knickknacks, paintings and all kinds of other goods. There was chill funky music playing in the background. There was a big stage set up on one end where they did a fashion show last night and where there will be a concert tonight. There were tons of people mingling and shopping and, of course since it’s Europe, smoking. I could have done without the smoking, but other than that the place had a very cool vibe.

Things are happening in Prague. To me these things speak of the beauty, creativity, and individuality that is still very much alive in Prague. Some days I don’t see it. Honestly, some days Prague feels dead. But, today I was reminded that Prague is very much alive. The spring is here in Prague and there is so much more to come.

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany

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Prague: The Good and The Bad

February 9th, 2010

Yesterday I found myself thinking about what I like and don’t like about Prague and my life in Prague. As I thought I realized that many of the little things that I like and don’t like are opposite sides of the same coin.

I like that there are four distinct seasons in Prague. I like that the city feels like a completely different place with each season. In the summer the atmosphere is crowded and animated as the city comes alive with festivals as well as tourists. In the fall the leaves change colors, there’s a crispness in the air, and the city seems itself to speak of bygone days and ancient stories. In the winter the snow on the rooftops, the charm of the Christmas markets and the lights that shine through the dreaded darkness give the city a magical ambiance. And in the spring everything aches with new life and the new birth that even the very buildings seem to have longed for throughout the cold winter.
…But, having four distinct seasons means there is a bitter cold winter that lasts far longer than I would like. I really hate being cold and I often feel like I’m always cold here.

I like living in an expat community. I like that when I meet other Americans we have an instant connection, and a whole set of shared experiences right from the start. There is something instantly bonding just because we are from the same country and culture. And there is something bonding about the fact that we have both experienced what it is like to move overseas and live in foreign Prague. I like that most (if not all) of the expats I’ve met seem to be always on the lookout for friends and “family” here in Prague. Expats usually aren’t in closed circles, they aren’t ingrained in the same circles of friends that they’ve had for years upon years. Instead they are constantly looking for friends and open to meeting people. We have all uprooted from our friends and family and we know that the only way to survive here is to establish strong bonds and friendships. I like that. I like that people are really open to one another and looking for friends. It all makes getting to know people a lot easier in a way.
…But, I also really dislike living in an expat community because it means that you live in a constantly transient community. Most expats don’t stay long in Prague. They come for all different reasons – to teach, to preach, to work. Some come just for the experience and the adventure of it. But, no matter what their reason is most don’t stay longer than a few years. Bryan and I are still fairly new to Prague (we’ve only been here for 3 years) but we have been here long enough to say good bye to good friends and those who could have been good friends. It’s hard to live and build community when you never know how long someone will be around, or even how long you will be around.

I love not having a car. I love that I don’t have to pay for gas or car insurance or deal with fixing it when it brakes. I love that I get more exercise without even trying here just from all the walking. I love that my transportation doesn’t use up as many resources and I’m not having as negative of an effect on the world around me.
…But, I don’t really like actually using public transportation. I don’t like that it takes me twice as long to get across the city as it would with a car. I don’t like that if I miss the tram I have to stand out in the cold sometimes for 10 or 15 minutes. I don’t like squeezing onto a crowded tram or metro, worrying about pick-pockets, or the smell. And I don’t like that my husband doesn’t like to talk on public transportation so we rarely are able to have conversations on the way to and from places.

I love the friends we have here and I love living life with them. We do know some really amazing people here. We have friends here who really care about us as individuals and as a couple and who already really love Thaddeus. We have friends here who by their very lives and generosity have poured out blessing after blessing upon us and we are so grateful to know them and be in community with them.
…But, living life with these friends means not living daily life with other friends and family in the states, who also care about us deeply. I don’t like that.

Well, Thaddeus just woke up from his nap so… that’s all for now, folks!

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany Stedman

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There goes Christ…

January 28th, 2009

The other day I was walking out of the metro and I saw a homeless man, he was clearly drunk and talking to himself. And as I saw him and old saying that my mom had taught me years ago popped into my head:

“There, but by the grace of God go I.”

My mom had taught me this saying that we could never really think better of ourselves than others because really we are just like them. Without God’s grace and different circumstances and choices in our lives we might be in the exact place. But, I realized something as I thought about this saying. It doesn’t really teach what it’s intending to teach. It’s suppose to show us that we can’t look down on other people or judge them and we should instead be thankful that by God’s grace we aren’t in the situation that they are in. It’s supposed to show us our commonality as human brothers and sisters.

But, think about this saying for a moment, “There, but by the grace of God, go I.” As I thought about it I realized that it doesn’t minimize pride it magnifies it. It focuses not on our commonalities with our brothers and sisters who suffer, but on our differences. Yes, we recognize that they are in some ways like us but in the same breath we recognize that by God’s grace we aren’t them and we have it better than they do. Yes, we say it is by God’s grace that we have it different, but doesn’t that imply that God’s grace doesn’t also extend to the needy brother that we pass by? And really don’t we sort of think that yes it’s by God’s grace, but God’s grace is extended to me because well, I’m better – I didn’t make the mistakes that person made, I haven’t sinned like that person has, etc.

As I thought about this more I could see how some could say this saying in a way that had much more in common with Pharisee in Luke 18 than with genuine humility and thankfulness.

“Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men – robbers, evildoers, adulterers – or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’ But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’ I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.”

“There, but by the grace of God, go I.” Doesn’t connect people. It divides them. Even though it seems to acknowledge our similarities it says that by the grace of God that person is less than me and thanks God that I am not like him. Maybe instead of saying “There, but by the grace of God, go I.” We should say simply “There go I.” And remember that the needy brother or sister at our side is no different than us and we are no different than them. Or maybe instead we should say, “There goes Christ.” Remembering that whatever we do to the least of these we do unto Christ himself.

I think sometimes the place to start in changing our actions is changing our thought process and so I am trying to change the way I think and the language I use towards those who appear more needy than I appear to be.

Rejoicing in the journey -
Bethany

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